Healing the Mind and Heart

Forgiveness Equals Inner Peace

Brian32746-2606 — Sun, 13 May 2012 15:17:51 GMT

Forgiveness is the key to having a high quality life following a spinal cord injury, because whether you were assaulted by someone, whether you were in a car accident plus it was the other drivers fault,whether you were in a auto or motorcycle accident and it was your fault or if it was just a freak accident if you don't forgive either the people or person who caused your injury or you don't forgive yourself for causing your spinal cord injury then you will be angry, bitter, or resentful for the rest of your life. For you to heal totally on the inside you must be forgiving , because if you don't you will never find true inner peace,happiness or joy and will keep yourself from having the highest quality of life that you possibly can. For instance when I was injured after being assaulted by four security guards while at a rock concert after only a few weeks a Chaplin came into my cubical in shock trauma and explained to me if I want to be forgiven by God then I had to first forgive the four guys that assaulted me, if i wanted God to forgive me. I thank God that the Chaplin came into my room and prayed with me,because immediately after we got done praying I felt a release in my spirit once I forgave the four guys who had assaulted me and broke my neck which rendered me paralyzed from the neck down. Over the past seventeen and a half years I have suffered intense chronic burning nerve pain throughout most of my body and I always tell people that I wouldn't wish the pain that I feel every waking moment on the guys that broke my neck that completely cut my spinal cord into which caused the burning pain. I wouldn't be half of the man that I am today without going to church at The Masters Touch International Church, because of my Pastor Mark Chirrona's preachings and teachings about how Jesus Christ bore all our sins, illnesses and pain on the cross which gave us total forgiveness of our sins as long as we have repented for our sins and have forgiven everyone who has physically or emotionally hurt us. Don't get me wrong ,I'm not saying that it is easy to forgive, but what I am trying to get across to all of you who are reading this is that the key to inner healing is forgiveness of those who have hurt us in one way or another . Sometimes forgiveness comes to us as easy as over night , but to others sometimes forgiveness can take many years to achieve. If you don't want to be alone throughout your life time following a tramatic experience such as a spinal cord injury , you have to find inner piece, happiness and joy so that people will find you to be pleasant to be around.. Sometimes when someone gets depressed they also show signs of anger, bitterness and resentment,so if you ever start feeling the signs of depression ,such as sadness ,anxiety or mood swings please seek help from a mental health professional.Over the past years I have had many problems with my family that have caused such horrible emotional pain such as writing to a judge false reports that I was trying to drive my wheelchair out into traffic to kill myself which led to a sheriff coming to my door,then the sheriff asked me if I knew why he was there,so I said no which he replied I am here with a 72 hour baker act order from a Seminole County judge plus he told me the ambulance was there to tke me to South Seminole Hospital,then the psychiatric nurse came into my room where I was due to the fact she wanted to go over some things with me before I was admitted plus she told me she couldn't believe any nudge would sign the baker act reports due to what was written in the affidavits from my family,then the psychiatrist came into my room to talk with me then she said"Remember these three words circle,ocean,yellow",then she talked with me for approximately to 45 minutes to an hour longer,then she asked me if I remembered the three words so I said,"Yes ma'am circle,ocean,yellow",then she told me they never release anyone that has been baker acted by a judge for 72 hours,but she felt that I was no harm to myself so she released me to go home,then I was taken home by Royal Metro ambulance to my home,then my caregiver at the time who was with me went to my front door to get my family to let me in,my sister opened the door and said"What the hell you doing here,my brother's been baker acted for 72 hours." which she replied,"No the psychiatrist released him and the paramedics are bringing him in right now." My sister screamed"Mom they released Brian from the hospital" and while the paramedics were bringing into my room as I passed by the kitchen area where my mother was sitting the look on her face was as if she was seeing a ghost. My mother came into my room and told me she had something to tell me but I wasn't going to like it plus even though I didn't like it she was going to tell me anyway so she told me that she got my temporary guardianship plus throwing it up in my face while telling me to give them my checkbook,credit cards plus all my money I had in my wallet. My mother told me I had to go where she wanted me to go,she told me I had to do what she wanted me to do,and she told me she had full control of how my was to be spent. My sister was also lashing out at me by saying things such as I hate you, you're not my brother anymore, I hope you die and go to hell. Even though after having paid all the bills in the house for 15 years,took my mother on three trips to Hawaii, took my brother on one trip to Hawaii with his wife, took my sister and her daughter on another trip to Hawaii they still treated me like trash. My brother came running in my room a week after what my sister had said to me and told me I wasn't his brother anymore,he hated me,he hoped I died and went to hell for what I was doing to my mother and sister.These things had led to me being chronically depressed, but I had to overcome the feelings of anger,anxiety and resentment for me to forgive them so when I go on to Heaven that God would be able to forgive me also.I know that God brings people into our lives for only a season, because they only need to be there for a short time. God is also so full of grace and mercy that he replaces the people that he took out of your life with other people that love you unconditionally for who you are, take care of you no matter what and help you when you're in need without looking for a handout. First of all,I forgive my mother due to the fact that I know she was being influenced by my sister,brother and my sister in law for the verbal attacks and the horrible actions she took towards me so I know she didn't do all these things on her own and I forgive her first and foremost. Then the second person I forgave was my sister in law,because she really didn't say anything to me personally or verbally attack me to my face so I forgave her pretty easily. The third person I forgave was my sister,because even though she verbally attacked me constantly,constantly used profanity towards me when she was my caregiver plus even though she helped influence my mother to do the things she did towards me I know my sister has mental health problems I forgave her due to the fact that I know she was chronically depressed,partially what I thought was bi polar and she had such a low self esteem that it made her feel better to attack me. Then the last person I forgave for his actions was my brother,because he stormed in my room used vulgar profanity while yelling at me "Your not my brother,I hate you,I hope you die and go to hell,because of what you are doing to mom and Edna my sister". Even though I loaned him $239,000 to purchase his home,so that he would not have worry about going into foreclosure he stopped paying me after making only 36 payments which left a balance of approximately $195,000 that he owes me,but even though I have forgave him for what he has done I am taking him to civil court for the $195,000 that he owes me. My prayers are first of all for my niece Kaya that she not be negatively influenced by my family or have my family tell her negative things about me to make her not love as her uncle anymore,because she is the closest child that I have come to having my own child and I love her dearly and always will. My other prayers are for my family,so that they will realize the hurtful verbal attacks they said to me plus how their verbal attacks hurt me,that the actions they took by getting me baker acted plus getting my temporary guardianship made me feel betrayed by the ones that I loved the most and took care of for a little over 15 years by paying all the bills and purchasing my sister two cars plus a truck and also purchasing my brother a 100 year anniversary heritage softtail Harley Davidson motorcycle. I also had purchased many other things for my family members to try to show them how I love them,since I am paralyzed from the neck down I can not hug them,kiss them on the cheek or shake my brothers hand to show my love and affection for my family. I also forgave my family for only sticking around while I was the financial cash cow for the family and then once I cut them off they deserted me faster than a blink of an eye. Remember that it always seems in life that the ones you love the most are the ones that hurt you the most,but you have to forgive them if you want to be forgiven on the day you go home and are face to face with Jesus Christ so he can forgive you and welcome you home into his Kingdom of Heaven.

Mind,Body and Spirit

Brian32746-2606 — Sun, 13 May 2012 15:15:47 GMT

During these 17 1/2 plus years I have learned many things,and one of those things is that when someone suffers a spinal cord injury they seek to become whole and well. I believe that to become whole and to have total wellness it takes to be whole in mind,body and spirit. First of all,by being whole in your mind I mean you have to be emotionally strong,not depressed,filled with the peace that surpasses all understanding that is given to you by God,and to have a never give up train of thought. The second of all,your body has to be as healthy as humanly possible,even though you may be quadriplegic like myself from the neck down or a paraplegic paralyzed from the waist down,you still have to eat healthy,take a multi vitamin,drink cranberry juice to prevent urinary tract infections and depending upon how high of level of injury you are you may also have to do breathing treatments to keep your lungs open to prevent from getting pneumonia. I also believe in getting the flu shot and pneumonia vaccine every year,because there are others in this world who are not considerate plus do not cover their mouth when they cough or sneeze which spreads germs everywhere,which if you happen to be around them it makes you susceptible to catching whatever illness that that person or those persons may have. Depending upon the level of SCI you have if you are able to exercise in some manner it is very beneficial to yourself to exercise at least 3 times a week,because you get your heart rate up,increase your muscle mass,increase your strength and increases your stamina which will allow you to sit up in your wheelchair a longer period of time. Now let's talk about the element of your spirit,because if you have a spirit which is filled with anger,bitterness,sadness and a loss of hope,you will not be able to have as high a quality of life as possible. God is a good God and he does not want see his children with a spirit of fear,depression,loneliness or with a lack of hope. I believe that having total wellness includes having a sound mind,having a healthy body,but most importantly having a spirit filled with the peace that surpasses all understanding,compassion plus love for others,knowing that with God your spirit is not alone and also having a tremendous amount of hope with also having an incredible amount of faith. The bible says as long as you have the faith of a mustard seed you can accomplish anything that you set your mind to and have the faith that you can accomplish whatever you se out to do in life. For instance,I volunteer at The Disability Wellness Center located at 1501 West First Street in Sanford,Florida 32771 as the co-host and founder of The Disability Wellness Center Spinal Cord Injury Social Club,but not the founder of The Disability Wellness Center itself. Nadia Kiswani is the founder and CEO who created The Disability Wellness Center,because 6 years ago her father suffered a spinal cord injury due to be in an automobile accident rendering him paralyzed from the middle of his chest down,even though he has a high level of injury he is regaining use of his arms slowly due to getting extensive physical therapy Lance who has helped him for several years. The DWC Spinal Club Injury Social Club is where those with spinal cord injuries can come together with their peers who also have suffers spinal cord injuries,so they can make new lifelong friends to help them overcome life's challenges with someone by their side and also to get counseling from my co- host Hector Del Valle who is an accomplished and award winning Bi-Lingual dependency counselor with more than 25 years public speaking experience including numerous media appearances. Emphasizing healthy family and intimate relationships and lifestyles,and also receive peer mentoring from myself Brian Cross that has been paralyzed 17 1/2 plus years while also being a peer mentor for 12 years. In June of 2012 myself Brian Cross will be starting to take classes online majoring in Christian Ministries from Oral Roberts University,so that I can become either an adult pastor,a youth minister or do pastoral counseling which will be a blessing due to the fact that I can combine Gods word with my peer mentoring skills to help others with spinal cord injuries that can't help themselves or are in need of spiritual and emotional help. I presently go to church and have learned that with facing life's tests you create your own testimony that while you are peer mentoring someone who has a recent or. new spinal cord injury by using your life's experiences you can inspire,motivate and give hope to those you mentor that they can have a high quality of life even from a wheelchair. It took me the first 5 years post injury to become well in my mind,body and spirit,because from suffering from the nerve pain one night I was in the emergency room and I told the doctors I was not going to eat anymore,drink anymore or take my medicine anymore if they didn't do something to alleviate my chronic nerve pain. Then the best thing that could have happened to me believe it or not was that the head of the emergency room baker acted me at ORMC,and they transferred me to Florida Hospital South to the psych med unit. I didn't realize that I was depressed,because I seemed to be enjoying life and thought that I was happy,but once I was in the psych med unit and talked with a psychiatrist I found out that I suffered chronic depression from being assaulted so violently and having such a traumatic spinal cord injury due to being assaulted. Once I was in the unit the next morning that I woke up they started me on an antidepressant,did an MRI of my spinal cord and started trying different medicines to alleviate my pain,so I started eating everything in sight. I met a gentleman Coleman who was in the same hospital room I was in and once I noticed he had tattoos I felt instantly at ease,because of having a total body suit of tattoos myself. Coleman was such a nice guy even though he was facing several psychiatric problems,but even though he had his own problems he fed me my breakfast due to the fact it took the nurse so long to get to my from,helped me to force fluids by drinking a lot of water due to the fact that I had a urinary tract infection plus he made sure the nurses turned me very 2 hours due to the fact that I was on a regular hospital bed mattress so that I would not get a bed sore. I was only in the psych med unit for 3 days,then I was released to go home,then I started seeing a psychiatrist and a short time later after I was released Coleman was also released,so I bought him a new wardrobe of clothes along with 2 pairs of sneakers. Coleman would come over and spend the weekend with me at my house and we became really good friends,but it was a shame due to the fact that I told him we could be friends if he stayed off of any type of drug including alcohol and I went to Hawaii in January of 1999 with my mother plus my friend Marco. When I returned I called Coleman's house and his mother told me he went on a road trip with his brother who was a truck driver that used drugs and alcohol,because he went with his brother I believe Coleman got hooked back on drugs which led to me never seeing or hearing from him again. Then in June of 1999 I decided I wanted to get a bigger house,so I randomly picked a painter out of the phone book to call for an estimate on how much it would cost to paint the entire inside of my house. It just so happened that the gentleman that we called was a Christian and when he came to give me an estimate he told that he probably would not be able to paint my house,but since my mother him about how I was paralyzed and all that I had gone through up to that point he wanted to come and pray for me while also giving me an estimate. As God would have it Patrick Thatcher the painter called me with the estimate and said if I thought the price was right he would push back his next painting job so that he could paint my house. I believe God had Patrick be the one to paint my house,because everyday that Patrick came to paint my house in the morning he would pray with me and in the evening when he was leaving he would pray with me again which opened the door in my heart for God to come in. After 2 weeks of Patrick painting and praying with me at my house he invited me to go to church on the last Sunday Benny Hinn would preach at The World Outreach Center,because after that Sunday it would turn into FaithWorld and be pastored by Clint Brown. We were in service for 4 hours and to me it only seemed like we were in there for only 10 minutes plus it seemed like even Hugh 5,000 people in the church that it was only me,Benny Hinn and God in the room. The sermon that was preached was exactly what I needed to hear at that point in my life to heal my broken spirit which led to me receiving from God the peace that surpasses all understanding,true happiness for the first time since my injury and a loving heart for others who were in my same condition. I started peer mentoring to those with recent spinal cord injuries and would use what I learned in church every week that I went to help the person I was mentoring to overcome the challenge they were facing whether it be physical,emotional or spiritual. Every time that I would be mentoring someone God always gave me the perfect words to say to that person which were the words that they needed to hear for exactly the challenge they were going through without me even knowing what they were going though at that point in time God stepped right in and used me as the connection between him and the person that I was mentoring to . It sad to say that God had to allow me to become completely paralyzed,so that I would slow down enough for him to get my undivided attention. I must confess that in many ways my spinal cord injury has been the best thing that has ever happened to me,because God took me from being an alcoholic,being a trouble maker ana also took me away from being a womanizer plus also stopped me from using street drugs such as marijuana. He has also put in my heart the compassion,love and the dreams for me to be able to help others whether they be those who have suffered a spinal cord injury,a young teenager facing who was constantly getting in trouble,an able bodied person that was facing a challenge they thought they could not overcome or one of my caregivers who are my family members that were going through something that they needed me to touch and agree with them plus say a prayer to allow God to go into action and help all those that I have mentioned to overcome every obstacle or challenge they were facing. On January 22,2012 LaTrenda who is one of my angel caregivers took me to church where we were we only planning on staying for the first service plus we sat way over in the overflow section,but as God would have it we went down and sat in the front of the church where the pastor always wants me to sit for second service and the message that my Bishop preached gave me a whole new outlook on life. While he was preaching the message in the second service I felt my spirit jump inside me ,because the message was what I needed to hear at that exact moment about everything that was going on my life not just only in one area. I am the happiest I have been in my life at this moment,because my eyes were opened and I realized how blessed of a man of God I am due to the fact that I have 3 angels taking care of me named Tangela,LaTrenda plus Angela,due to the fact that I am going back to school to study to become a pastor and that The Disability Wellness Center Spinal Cord Injury Social Club that I co- host that is going to be so awesome plus it will help I believe over the years not tens of people,not hundreds of people but thousands of people in need. I also am exacted beyond words,because my roommate Cliff and I have gotten our revisional patent number for a food product that we created that I believe is going o make the both of us multi millionaires which will allow me to give my angels who take care of me either a large bonus or a size able raise that will make their lives easier and also have a higher quality. I am believing and trusting in God with all the faith that my mind,body and spirit contains that I will achieve my bachelors degree in Christian Ministries,will sell our patent for a sizable amount of money that will allow me to also give money to my caregivers who have children to have enough money to start off a nice college fund for each of them,pay off my town home,pay off all my debts and also have enough to pay for my total education so that when I'm done I do not owe any money for student loans all the glory and all the thanks be to God for what he has done in my life and what he is about to do not only in my life but also in my caregivers lives who are also my family members also.

Dr. Dan honored by UofP

Gerthro — Tue, 08 May 2012 19:41:18 GMT

Dr. Dan was honored in Philadelphia last week. Our man in the field Sam Maddox was there and sent back this report. Congrats Dr. Dan and thanks for all you do for us here!

Daniel Gottlieb, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist whose family therapy outreach includes live weekly sessions in the Reeve Foundation “Healing the Mind and Heart” section. Dr. Dan, as he is known, was honored last week with the Living from the Heart award from the University of Pennsylvania Program for Mindfulness and the Abramson Cancer Center.

As part of the ceremonies, Dr. Dan was interviewed on stage by Terry Gross (pictured) of National Public Radio’s Fresh Air program.

Dr. Dan hosts a weekly radio show, Voices of the Family, on Philadelphia’s WHYY. Gross’s radio show also originates there; he has been a guest on Fresh Air several times.

Dr. Dan reminded Gross that he doesn’t give advice so much as he "tells my story." His story is that of the wounded healer: he was spinal cord injured in 1978, paralyzed below the chest with minimal hand function. He uses a power wheelchair. His wife left him 10 years after his injury; she later died of cancer. He lives with chronic pain.

Using techniques to quiet his mind (mindfulness), Dr. Dan has learned to tolerate discomfort and to embrace change. "I am so, so blessed," he said. He has learned to be more compassionate. He tries to live in the moment and urges his clients to do so. "I live the life I have, not the one in some narrative based on 'if only, if only….' I want people to know I’m OK even when I’m suffering."

No one here has ever been unfriendly

Moongink — Tue, 01 May 2012 09:52:46 GMT

I have just recently joined - about a month ago and I must say I truly have not encountered a single rude person in that time...on every other website I have encountered people who think they're special and feel it's their mission to put others down. I like how everyone supports each other here and I am thankful for my new friends.
Moongink/Carolyn

Hard to find friends, etc.

brenda — Fri, 06 Apr 2012 23:46:59 GMT

I am having a hard time here, I got a message from someone and now I cannot find it (story of my life)..
I really need friends like me with SCI- help me navigate these posts please!!

Solitude and Loneliness

Moongink — Thu, 05 Apr 2012 22:30:00 GMT

I am one who has always enjoyed a certain amount of solitude but since my accicent last summer I am alone a lot of time when I wish I wasn't - I am sometimes actually lonely. Everybody thinks "Wouldn't it be cool not to have to work?" My answer is "NO!" I'd
do just about anything to go back to where I was before my accident. I was a fifteen year (plus) pain management patient (Fibromyalgia, Chronic Myofascial Pain, Osteo-Arthritis, Thoracic Outlet Syndrome, etc.) and I had other health concerns like stereogenosis, hypothyroidism, asthma, etc before my car hit a very large tree last year and broke my neck. I've always been the kind of person that a friend could call at 3AM in an emergency and I would go. Why have so many of the people in my life gone away? Is the whole world really TOO BUSY?

what heals a broken heart?

Dan Gottlieb — Tue, 28 Feb 2012 20:09:46 GMT

All of us have experienced broken hearts and broken dreams. And in many respects, those broken hearts cause more suffering than broken bodies. So I would like to start a discussion about what heals your heart when it broken and what interferes with that healing process.

Of course we have no way to really know what heals our hearts, when they heal all we have is our theories. Similarly, we have our series about why they are not healing or why they broke in the first place.

We know that certain things foster resilience and recovery: relationships and love, good insurance and a strong support network, a previous baseline mood of relative happiness and well-being, the ability to be productive in the world and faith.

But what we don't know is chicken and egg. For example, we might not have control over our insurance, and certainly if we are well loved that can feel like a safety net. But we also have a great deal of control over who we love, how many we love and how well we love.

So I would love you to weigh in on what you feel has contributed and interfered with your healing process. And please weigh in on what you feel you still need in order for your heart to heal.

Looking for Spiritual Retreat

Wheelchair Traveler — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 18:34:47 GMT

I've been looking for a spiritual retreat for a while now and it seems all of them are NOT wheelchair accessible. Does anyone know of anything?

Open your mind !!!

Patrickp — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 12:29:27 GMT

For most people serious healing is either chemical or surgery ... But there is other ways !!! One very serious orthopedist doctor American he is has search other ways !!! Is name is Robert O Becker and the books he has written are very very interesting, he has searched on how mother nature has solved the problems we have, us small human being. His books are still available : "The body electric" and "Cross current " you find them easily on Amazon !! This is a must, after reading this your mind is more curious about non standard medicine, this is not an ok to believe anything and your mind must stay alert .... Read them and tell me what you think ?

Feeling 30 years + and - my age

Michele — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 23:08:52 GMT

Ever since I had GBS (November 2005 at the age of 27) I have felt like a toddler and a senior at the same time. I suffer from residual fatigue and weakness from the GBS. Physically, I feel like I poop out like a little old lady. Sometimes just forcing myself to stay awake is exhausting.
But then there's the mental/emotional fatigue where I describe the feeling as being like a toddler who fell asleep under the coffee table at a party due to overstimulation from excitement. Lots of noise or being around a lot of people makes me tired, it's almost like all of their energy builds up and makes me feel exhausted.
The worst part is it seems to get a little bit worse with every passing year. I'm now 33 and I can't seem to do things as often or for as long as I could at 28.

I've been having a very difficult time explaining this to my doctors. What are your thoughts?

Remembering Christine

Dan Gottlieb — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 19:36:56 GMT

I first met Christine through this discussion about a year ago. A beautiful young woman, an artist who was injured in 2005 as a result of a diving accident. This all happened at the kind of party very young people have and Christine blamed herself for becoming a quadriplegic. And so she suffered.

And she suffered because she couldn't envision having quality of life with all of her difficulties with her bowels and pain and all of the other issues that go with quadriplegia.

Nevertheless she fought tenaciously to have the quality of life that she needed to survive.

We spoke through public discussions, and we spoke through private e-mail correspondence. And she became clear that she did not want to suffer anymore.

She told me in the spring that she was going to visit her mother in Florida to say goodbye and when she got home she was going to consult hospice and refuse food and medication.

My first reaction was to try to save her life. I reacted not as a psychologist, but quadriplegic who understood that suffering and knew that what feels intolerable can become tolerable. I reacted as a father who couldn't bear the idea that someone I cared about so much wanted to take her life.

We continued our correspondence briefly and even spoke on the phone. When I got past my own distress, I could see she was clear about what she wanted to do and even seen at peace with it. There was no anger or even despair. Just a thoughtful reflective decision.

As a psychologist, I wanted more time to listen to her, to hold her life. As a moral man, I wanted to step back and allow her respect her wishes.

Last week I was notified that Christine passed away just as she had planned. I had mixed feelings. I was glad she was no longer suffering. But the other emotions I felt I couldn't quite identify until I remembered an event that took place many years ago in California.

I was visiting a dear friend of mine and she took me to see the redwoods for the first time in my life. I was in awe as I witnessed these massive structures when my friend said: "you know Dan for such big trees, they have shallow roots systems." I asked her how they were able to get their stability: "These trees tend to grow in clusters and their root systems interlock, that's how they get their stability."

When I heard about Christine, I felt a bit less stability. I wish her and her family peace. I wish that for all of us.

Depression/ Anger/ Worry

Josh P — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 20:41:42 GMT

My name is Josh, a year and a half ago, my daughter, who was ten at the time, fell from some playground equipment which resulted in a blood clot on her spinal cord, she is a t3 paraplegic. I check her emotional and psychological state regularly and she is surprisingly upbeat and emotionally healthy, unfortunately I cannot say the same for myself- I have not recovered from her injury and I'm afraid I never will. As a father my heart is absolutely broken and I'll never be the same. I have experienced a pervasive depression since the day of her injury. She has always been a light in the darkness to me and my baby girl. I worry about her constantly- her health, her future. I worry that she will get a cold or the flu and contract pnuemonia. I worry that she will be treated poorly and looked down upon. I love my daughter more than anything in the world and i suffer for her daily. I have tried therapy but gave up after i couldnt find the correct therapist, I have trouble talking to anyone about it, and have been putting on a smile and an act of false confidence. This persistant, deep sadness invades every part of my life every minute of my day. I worry over her always, twice a week I dream that she begins walking.The quality of my mental and emotional state declines every day. I am overwhelmed with despondancy and worry. I only want to know that she is going to have a long life and be ok. I want someday to be happy and experience joy again. I desperately need some help.

being mocked/not believed of being in agony as am 'too happy'

wheeliebird — Tue, 22 Nov 2011 09:13:19 GMT

Dear Dr Dan

I was left undiagnosed with disc herniation for 2 years. Sadly by the time I was believed by dr's, I needed emergency surgery.

I was relieved to know what was wrong, knowing I was not 'mad'.

I forgave and tried to rehabilitate, told surgery was successful.

Luckily for me, my own family Dr believed me this time when I said I was in as much agony as the time I had surgery. I was found to have a spinal cord injury plus mri had shown the disc had not been removed fully during surgery.

I felt more upset this time. Yet concentrated on them lovely Dr's who believed me over the operating surgeon. I didnt want bitterness in my life.

Recently I heard that some people with disability/able bodied were laughing and mocking me, saying I was in a wheelchair out doors as I wanted to 'pretend' to be a complete injury.

I wonder why I feel so distressed when others, and so far it is only a very few whom say this, mock me for being happy, positive, looking 'too well'. Please would you be able to offer any insight as to why I am so strongly upset by this 'not being believed/mocking' from a few others?

I have lived thorough other life traumas and found being depressed has such a negative impact on my feelings and health, I naturally think positive. I have found I tend to go in the direction my mind takes me. Yet somehow I feel I am 'wrong' for being the way I am.

Kindest regards

.

Is acceptance key to living a fulfilling life?

Annie60093 — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 16:15:23 GMT

A FacingDisability forum visitor posted a very interesting question on acceptance, which got us thinking...

"This may seem to be a curt reply but I do not mean it that way. Here goes; Why is it that you feel compelled to "accept" your condition? Do you believe this acceptance is intrinsically necessary in order to live the fullest life possible?"

What are your thoughts? Please share below or on the FacingDisability Forum.

How did you accept your SCI?

Annie60093 — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 20:14:58 GMT

Facing Disability’s Forum section has a new discussion thread that really needs your answers. How did you deal with you new SCI and accepting your new identity in wheelchair?