Daniel Gottlieb, Ph.D., a practicing psychologist and family therapist, will be live in this section every Wednesday from 3-4 p.m. ET. Leave a question or comment anytime for him!
I appreciate your post and trust me, there are many many angry people out there. And I assume you posted this because your anger is causing you all sorts of problems not to mention how uncomfortable it is to live with such a hair trigger on your emotions.
I've always believed that anger is a reactive emotion-that is, it's a reaction to another emotion underneath that. In your post, you said many things about yourself and how you feel about your life. For example, you described yourself as a paraplegic working on a three-quarter ton Harley-Davidson F1 50. As soon as I read that, I wondered if you were feeling alone in this world or "different". That was confirmed when you talked about not fitting with quadriplegics and not fitting with people without physical disabilities.
In all my years of living and practicing, there is nothing more painful than feeling alone and misunderstood in this world. Everyone is wired differently so that when I felt that way, I became quite depressed. My guess is because of your wiring it turns into anger or irritability.
So here I am making a ton of assumptions and maybe none of them are correct. I would love to hear from you about the emotions you really feel when you find yourself snapping at someone. If you could just stop for 60 seconds and reflect on how you are experiencing your life at that moment, what would you say?
There are lots of ways of dealing with this pain, but let's see what's really happening first.