http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain I posted about pain in various places in this discussion, but I think the topic is important enough that it should have its own topic.
I will post below and interaction I had with a member during a private e-mail exchange. I am doing this because their permission.
But I would like to open this discussion about chronic pain to go beyond medications and medical interventions to discuss how we live with something that is both chronic and, well, pretty painful!]]> en-us Tue, 17 Jan 2012 17:40:42 GMT http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=175070#tr__175070 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=175070#tr__175070 But I do watch her over the course of this year and although her pain feels the same, her face appears less tense, her eyes less sunken and even her gait appears less impaired. One thing about having a mammalian brain is that we accommodate. Even when we don't want to, we accommodate. Even if what happened to us is unjust and we rail after God's, our bodies accommodate.

When I mentioned this to her, she said she didn't want to accommodate, she just wanted the pain to go away. Her mind was treating this pain as though it was acute; an emergency that needed to be addressed. But her body was treating it as though it was chronic and something she was going to have to live with.

There is such wisdom in our bodies if only we could trust it. Our bodies experience our lives without judgment or self-criticism, without having to fix or change anything. Our bodies just quietly experience and with great wisdom, our bodies know what we need. Our bodies know when we need rest, when we are hungry and when our hunger is satisfied. Our bodies not what brings us joy and what causes suffering.

And then there is our minds! Our minds are great storytellers. They tell us about our futures and they tell us about what everything means. They engage in critical self judgment and judgment of others. Our minds tell us who we should be and who we should not be. Meanwhile, our bodies just experience.

When our bodies feel pain, whether it is the heartbreak of physical or emotional pain, our bodies suffer. And then slowly the accommodate. And we all have this wisdom. Sadly, so many of us ignore it.]]> Tue, 17 Jan 2012 17:40:42 GMT Dan Gottlieb http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=173337#tr__173337 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=173337#tr__173337 At first I thought it was a simple but painful spasm, something common to us quadriplegics. But then I felt the pain radiate up my scalp where there are no muscles. Pinched nerve!   And people tell me there's not much you can do for a pinched nerve.

Terrific. Now I have this pinched nerve which feels like razor wire running up my neck and I also have neuropathic pain in both arms that feels like I have no skin. So I couldn't be happier because now I wake up in the morning and make noises like my grandfather used to make that I thought were disgusting!(sorry pop)

I don't want to address what specific things I am doing for both, I do want to address the issue of living with pain.

This past summer I saw an elderly woman waiting for an elevator brightly dressed and hunched over leaning on her cane apparently from arthritis. She was in visible pain, but when she turned around and saw me, she gave me the brightest most genuine smile and asked how I was. When I asked how she was, she said the sun was shining and she was going to go outside for a bit,: "so how could I not be happy?"

It turns out my pinched nerve gets worse when my neck and shoulder go into spasm. It's almost as though my body fights against the pain. But when it does, the pain gets worse.

So now I figure I could do one of two things. Either I will again open my body/mind to the pain I feel without fear or resentment. Or I could find nice lady hanging out by the elevator and spend more time with her. Hmm maybe both]]> Tue, 03 Jan 2012 21:29:27 GMT Dan Gottlieb http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172900#tr__172900 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172900#tr__172900 Wed, 28 Dec 2011 16:38:00 GMT Patrickp http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172857#tr__172857 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172857#tr__172857
 if the pain is severe we must pursue options. As long as those options don't have any dangerous or unforeseen side effect.

In addition, you must understand that pain is experienced differently in every body. So an effective treatment will vary from each individual. Like I said, I'm thrilled this worked for you. And I hope this technique gets tested extensively so that it can be another tool for those of us who suffer pain.

]]> Tue, 27 Dec 2011 23:00:01 GMT Dan Gottlieb http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172725#tr__172725 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172725#tr__172725 Sat, 24 Dec 2011 14:44:19 GMT Patrickp http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172707#tr__172707 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172707#tr__172707                             Norma]]> Fri, 23 Dec 2011 17:22:21 GMT nanaboombala http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172619#tr__172619 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172619#tr__172619 Wed, 21 Dec 2011 12:04:45 GMT Patrickp http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172214#tr__172214 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=172214#tr__172214
So happy you found a kindred spirit in Ronald. You have expressed so clearly how helpful it is to have someone who truly understands your experience.
It sounds like you are suffering from lots of claims of pain. Your body is suffering with physical pain, your body is also suffering because it is working so hard. But you also have what sounds like a terrible emotional and social pain. Pain about how you became disabled and pain about what happened after your ex husband injured you.
So you are suffering is about your body and about your spirit. Physical pain is difficult enough to deal with, but you have a double dose of different kinds of pain.
More often than not physical pain produces emotional pain. It goes from our brains to our bodies and vice versa but in its travels, our mind takes over and begins telling stories about the pain – we might recall people who have hurt us in the past or we might tell ourselves stories about how long it will last or how we may or may not find a way to live with it. We do things like that because that's what minds do.

I hope your connection with Ronald continues and I hope you stay connected with us.

Please take care]]> Tue, 13 Dec 2011 17:49:31 GMT Dan Gottlieb http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=171751#tr__171751 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=171751#tr__171751 Tue, 06 Dec 2011 22:19:45 GMT An http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=171749#tr__171749 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=171749#tr__171749 Physician David Biro wrote a book called "the language of pain". He had a bone marrow transplant which is excruciating. The message in his book is that there are no words to describe pain. Even the words you used to describe the experience of pain.
And often the greatest suffering around pain is having this powerful experience that no one else can really understand. And so we try to explain.
The good news is that there aren't discussions like this. Because everyone involved in this discussion knows the experience of chronic pain. There are no answers, but there are many kindred spirits here coming together share stories and hope had ideas.]]> Tue, 06 Dec 2011 22:04:25 GMT Dan Gottlieb http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=171462#tr__171462 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=171462#tr__171462
I was so upset when people rejected me because my body parts didnt work as well as before injury.

I realised I was the one who hurt myself the most. The body has and is doing a great job.  I'm still alive.  The body never had an instruction mannual how to fix itself. It never even grumbled at me louder than a slight grown of aches when I pushed it hard everyday to let me bring up my children, work, sports, drive before the injury.  And here I was punishing the body with my upset calling it stupid, useless.  All it had done was get injured and try to carry my mind to whereever it wanted to go.

I realised I blamed myself for not fixing it up right. I forgave myself for not be perfect, for not mending myself to the high standard I was used to.

I see pain as my friend, fixing body parts is hard work, of course it will shout at me in the form of pain to stop doing something that causes it pain. 

Instead of thinking and describing the pains as stabbing, freezing, burning, electricity shocking me...all which of course carries images that will petrify even the strongest of minds, I began to think 'ouch, that lady dancer is pushing me with her pointy heal because she wants me to get on stage and dance', I thought of the 'being crushed pain'  as if a muscle man famous boxer was giving me a big friendly hug in bright yellow starred shorts.

Its harder to feel frightened, sad, angry at something I find funny.  Images of knives, guns, ice blocks or scalding water, which nerve pain can 'feel' like.  I have been stabbed in my finger and it never felt like this 'stabbing nerve pain'. instead it stung really bad and I felt sick looking at the blood.

I got taught pain is an emotional response. When I hit my leg on the hyposensitive side I say ouch.  I cant even feel the hurt, yet proved to me just how conditioned my mind would assume it would hurt.

I dont feel sad when I'm in pain anymore. I simply acknowledge it and distract my mind as soon as I can. If not I would be sad 24/7 and I do too much hard work to live another day of pain, I sure wont go thorough all of this to feel sad.
]]> Fri, 02 Dec 2011 09:27:30 GMT wheeliebird http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=170094#tr__170094 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=170094#tr__170094
a psychoanalyst once said that the most difficult part of love is tolerating your own helplessness in the face of the loved ones suffering.  To be honest, you are not a loved one but I do care about you. And when I listen to your suffering, my heart opens. I am sorry you suffer and your devotion to your life is wonderful to see]]> Tue, 15 Nov 2011 20:34:52 GMT Dan Gottlieb http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=169181#tr__169181 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=169181#tr__169181 Additionally, I wear some leg warmers on days like today when we are having the beginning of the rainy season.   I have also heard that tantric massage works wonders and am looking into that sometime soon. Hope this helps!  Hugs and Blessings, 10C]]> Fri, 04 Nov 2011 12:30:05 GMT Tency http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=168371#tr__168371 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=168371#tr__168371
I told her that most humans live with delusions of influence. We all think we have more control over things then we really do. So we can fight with what's happening at this moment or not.
I began to learn these lessons 32 years ago when I realized how out of control I was. But back then all I could feel was rage and despair because I couldn't control what I wanted to. I got lucky. Because I am a slow learner I got a chance to learn that lesson over and over. And over!

15 years ago I began a formal practice of meditation. And to be honest I think the greatest learning from this practice is this:
when I commit to sit in my chair quietly for 30 min., and try to stabilize my awareness to what's happening in the moment, I begin to notice that big emotions come and go. Thoughts about how I really don't have time today to sit for 30 min., or I have to urgent calls to make and I am afraid I will forget so I better make them now, or perhaps thoughts of how much I want to play with my three-year-old buddy Jacob. And when I am committed to sitting, I notice all of these thoughts come and go. My heart rate changes as my mind mobilizes to do something and then I settled down as the next thought or emotion comes in.

I have learned that thoughts and emotions are not emergencies (unless a horn blows when we stepped into the street), they are just thoughts-even painful ones.

I am on the tail end of a five-day viral infection. One of the symptoms was violent spasms that were easily triggered. And you know that my body went into crisis every time – heart rate increased, throat tensed, I began to perspire and breathed heavily and my blood pressure went up. As you know, it's awful. And then I realized how much my body is suffering. The poor thing was in crisis but didn't know there was no crisis, and so it suffered. Repeatedly. And so did I. So I felt great compassion for my body and myself.

Nothing changed. But I felt much better.]]> Tue, 25 Oct 2011 14:23:22 GMT Dan Gottlieb http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=167951#tr__167951 http://www.spinalcordinjury-paralysis.org/discussions/healing-the-mind-and/2011/07/12/living-with-pain?tr=167951#tr__167951 to develop strategies against pain.

I could try massaging the area of the pain

I could also apply pressure on this place

I could try to focus my mind on the area of pain and try to suppress it !!
and believe me or not it could works!!

If nothing work I have a final tool :

One day a friend of mine came with a device called Cemtech

At that time I had a burning sensation on my right leg above my knee.

He used this device on me and ten minutes after the pain was gone
and never came again !!!!!

I have decided to buy this device impressed as I was .

It has been a very good move !!!

The idea is to find the meridian of acupuncture which goes through the area of the
pain and to put the cemtech accross this this meridian.

Usually it takes 5 mn to each bad spot to cure !!!

You may need more tools to help you , on amazon there is acupuncture
detection devices to help finding the spot , there is also acupuncture atlas
to describe were the meridian and spots are.

At home my wife does the job and it works well.

There is another bonus with this device you could use another program to
help rebuilding the damage area but this is another story and anyway even
if it could help a little it is not a full recovery that you could experience.

I hope that my post will help.

Good luck to you all.

Patrick.
]]> Wed, 19 Oct 2011 11:39:28 GMT Patrickp