My husband had a massive stroke 12/19/10 and has left side paralysis. He has been in a nursing home since his stroke as I can't take care of him like needs which is 24 hour nursing care. Although the stroke took away a lot he did not loose his mind, thoughts and memories. He is in a relativity good nursing home and paid 100% by the VA. They are a constant struggle but so far so good.
The problem is his sister. My husband is 55 and his sister is my age. She lives in MA and has been to see him 4 times in the last year and half. She is here now. She accused me of causing his stroke to begin with and no matter how hard I try she has ruined my relationship with his mother. Last night she called me and asked why he is not eating, why I am not there every day all day, why am I "sitting on my fat #### not doing anything" etc ... I send out text and emails when there is something to report. I have listed everyone to get information when they call or go see him which is not often (he has 3 kids over the age of 18), I have not kept them in the dark on anything but am getting tired of the accusations from his sister. I have type 1 diabetes and a 13 year old son who will need a kidney transplant sometime within the 2 years. My husband is not my son's dad. He is my second husband and I am his fourth wife. Due to all the stress I had a triple heart bypass seven months ago. Recently my husband fell out of his wheelchair and hurt his paralyzed hip. We are waiting for a Ortho consult from the VA. His weight has dropped and he does not want to eat much due to the pain. He recently went to see a pain specialist and his pain meds are being changed.
Any helpful suggestions? I hate it when sis in law comes to town because she creates all sorts of havoc and problems for my husband (and me). Thanks.